Today, a shallow dive into the but crack

Why not a deep dive?
Well, when it comes to the but crack, things can get a bit hairy if we go too deep.
A surface-level investigation should be more than enough for our purposes. 

What is the but crack, you ask?
Well,,,  the but crack is an unsightly divide that tears us away from tranquility.
It appears out of nowhere, and when least expected. 
Most of us will agree it’s rather unpleasant to focus on and yet, it’s hard to look away. 
Instead of simply ignoring the but crack we tend to follow it down and in to dark places.

Of course the but crack I am referring to is the interrupting mind chatter (which so often begins with a “but”), that shatters our moments of presence and draws us back into thought.

If you have been practicing mindfulness for a while, I expect you have experienced the but crack interrupting your moments of ‘here and now’ ever now and then. 
The butt-headed mind throws a wrench into our mindfulness and it seems to flush all peace and tranquility down the drain.

To review, the but crack can look something like this:

I will be sitting quietly, flirting with a beautiful state of presence. 
I feel alert. Everything is.  I am one with everything.  I have arrived.
Then, popping up and out of the blue (jeans)…
“BUT…”  it says. “You know you need to work tomorrow. Wouldn’t it be nice to just sit like this all the time?  I wish I didn’t have to work.  Remember when you sat in Hawaii.  I wonder if you could get a job in Hawaii and sit on the beach every morning” 
By that point I am swirling downward and my moment has been flushed. 

Or, another example:

I am focused.
Fully immersed in the task at hand. 
I am aware but also present – my movements, the environment, the materials I am working with, all flow. 
The feeling is wonderful.
…until the crack. 
“BUT…  did you send that email off?  Are you sure?  You should check.  What time is it?  You should really start making dinner.  Did you get onions?  Ah crap.  Traffic will be heavy now, maybe you order dinner tonight and make that tomorrow.  Why did you forget the onions?  Just add them to the list now.”
The enjoyment of the task at hand is gone. The moment is lost into the void of a “but”. 

Now I think you get the butt of my joking here.
These are just the minor buts.
But sometimes the buts are much more significant.
Big buts can Sure Mix-a-Lot of emotions up.

We have all experienced unenjoyable and challenging life experiences. 
Mistakes, loss, pain, sorrow.  Dwelling in these thoughts can overwhelm our minds.
This is suffering. 
Suffering is why we practice (mindfulness / meditation).  We practice to return our minds to the present. 
The ‘here and now’ of this moment is free of suffering and all the problems the mind can’t help but focus on.

It is in these moments of mental anguish when the refuge of presence the most valuable.   It is also these moments, when we are most vulnerable to the suffering mind, that the but crack appears – – and in the most offensive ways.

For example – I am dealing with a very challenging life event. 
Mentally working through the problem is overwhelming my mind. 
I can’t stop thinking about ‘it’ – including all the possible solutions or how things could have been different. 
I become lost in an infinite spiral of mind activity.

Eventually (thankfully) my practice kicks in.
I am reminded that the unenjoyable experience is just thoughts.
I am here, my thoughts are happening, but they are not who I am in this moment.
My practice frees me from the dwelling mind and the mental effort of searching for a solution subsides. 
The chatter quiets, my mental state becomes peaceful again.
I am back.  Present. Aware. I am free of the mind’s problems.
“…BUT…
“You know you are just avoiding your problems, right?  Problems don’t get resolved by sitting here in the now.  We really need a solution to that…  Oh my God, I cant believe that happened.  Shit.  What am I going to do?  A plan, I need a plan.  What if I… Or if I…   I need to figure this out.  If only I had…” 

And so on. 
One thing is for certain – my mind (mynd) will never tire of trying.
It exists to create and solve problems.

Even now, writing this, I must admit – the but crack does seem to have a point.
The but crack may be an ass to draw me back into my problems but, could it be right? 
How can being here and now help me resolve the very real problems I have?

Now, this is where I need you to stick with me like a pair of tighty-whities. 
Can we recognize the difference between actionable problems and mind problems?

Actionable problems are the universe butting into my ‘here and now’ practice with relevant information. 
Think of these ideas as helpful interruptions.
If it’s time to stop a task and make dinner, it’s time, and I stop. 
If I am reminded of an email to be sent, I can take a moment to set a reminder on my phone or stop and send the email. 
Either way, I act now rather than let it ruin my sitting.  

These helpful thoughts form a seamless part of my here and now practice.
In fact, they are why I practice quieting mind – so that I can hear the help as it arrives. 
Should that piano be falling from the sky above me, I what to hear that little voice suggest I “take three steps to the left”.

If I ignore or fight these actionable problems, I am really just avoiding life and that will only cause me more pain. Here, the best way to resolve a but crack is to pull up my pants and just move on with things.

On the other hand…
Some problems (most problems) do not have any actionable solution beyond the time-consuming act of problem solving itself. 
These are ‘mind problems’. 
Mind problems exist only in the mind and only for the mind’s benefit.

They are a make-work project of sorts – they keep the mind employed and feeling indispensable. They create suffering through their own attempted resolution. 
But they are tricky to see because they present as actionable problems but they only ever exist on a mental level.  

When it comes to mind problems, ironically, we need not get off our ass but instead sit on the but – these problem are fabricated within the fat of our mind, not our behind.

Mind problems do not exist beyond their own belief.
Their illusion can be realized through self-reflection and awareness of limitation, but humans generally don’t do very well with those qualities.  
This is where a practice is undeniably helpful as you approach the difficult and uncomfortable realization of acceptance.

The application works like this:
Make friends with the Truth.
Is there anything I can actually do, here and now, about my problem?
If yes, do it.  Don’t hesitate, get it done.
If not, this problem is not a actionable problem, my mind creating it.
 I know mind problems have no solution.
There is only the relief through here and now.
So I return to here and now and remain open.

I can assure you, but cracks will continue to form in every practice.
The but crack exists only to suck us deeper and deeper into the delusion of itself.
It originates from an insecure mind that is desperately looking for attention – it’s like it forgot it’s belt on purpose.  The whale-sized tales the mind tells may seem impressive at first glance but a practice of awareness allows us to see through like crystal-clear water.

Ah, but crack.  I see you there. 
 Let’s be honest…. once you have taken a good look at one but crack, you have seen them all.  

Recognizing the but crack makes its apperance so much less taboo.
We may even get to the point where a surprise but crack every now and then becomes an enjoyable part of the game. Now I’m not suggesting you must play with the but, that’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but at least recognize the but for what it is.  Respect the but.  It makes up a good portion of your earthly form.  Everyone’s experience here involves a but.

So, as we come to the rear end of this post, a summary…

Everyone’s practice will see it’s fair share of buts.
But cracks present as problems – few are helpful while most are unsightly.

Eventually we recognize all problems for what they are. 
We learn to carry on with our practice while remaining open to experience.
From there, we are ready to receive information as it become available.

Back again.  Here and now.  Over and over.  This is the practice.
There is nothing glamorous about it, but it acts as a cushion and makes life so much more comfortable.